42b0850b67f578670d9d10562ad9d000Dear Frankie,

At 7.27pm last Friday night you were probably greeted with the sight of a young German Shepherd running towards you with a big smile on her face and wagging her tail.  You didn’t get to see her, but you heard her barking and felt her head resting against you when you were in my tummy.

Her name is Curley, and like you she is very special to me.  When I knew that you wouldn’t make it into this world she was there for me every second, giving me lots of love, hugs and cuddles and licks, and if I could have taken her into hospital with me when you were born, I would have.  She was there for me when I had to leave you behind at the hospital and come home with a memory box instead of you, and ever since the day I brought her home she has been my rock and my shadow.

She has been through so much with me since I had her in April 2008, not just losing you, but so much else as well, and I don’t know how I will go on without her, just as I didn’t know how I would go on without you.  But I will go on, somehow, and I feel happier knowing that you are up there to look after her until I can get up there and look after you both myself.

You’ve probably worked out by now that she’s as regular as clockwork in terms of when she has her tea – 5.30pm-ish.  The fact she hasn’t wanted to eat this last couple of weeks has been a very bad sign, but now that she is pain free and young again I’m sure she’s got her appetite back with gusto.  She always has to have one of her dental stick chews after her tea, she will pester you until you give it to her, as she thinks of it as her pudding.  At 8pm every night, give her a small scoop of vanilla ice cream – your Grandparents used to do this when she stayed with them and she loved it.  And just before you go to bed, don’t forget to give her a rich tea biscuit, she won’t go to sleep without it.

She loves her toys and her favourites are squeaky toys and tennis balls.  She won’t give you her toys to throw, you will need to get them off her.  She likes to keep them in her mouth and parade around with them showing them off, humour her with this.  She will often lie down with one of her toys in her mouth, and I think this is from the time that she was used for breeding puppies by her previous owner.  I think having a toy in her mouth and near her all the time reminds her of her babies.

Be careful when you take her for a walk, she can pull a bit on her lead sometimes! Watch her around cats, she will chase them if she gets a chance.  Same with squirrels.  You can let her meet other dogs though, she’s very friendly and will make friends with them, as long as they want to make friends with her.  If she is barked at, she will naturally bark back.

Also, and this is very important, make sure that you keep her on a lead if you are near a river, she loves water and will be in it like a shot.  She enjoys having a bath as she loves water, not many dogs enjoy having a bath, but she does.

At night, let her sleep on the bed with you. She will protect you with her life and will want to be close to you.  She loves her blanket and likes to have one of her toys near her when she sleeps, it is almost like a comfort thing for her.

One final thing to warn you about, she hates having her photo taken.  She even knows if you are trying to take a photo of her with your phone.  You have to do it so that she’s not looking at you, like stealth so she doesn’t realise, or turn off all the sounds and clicks so that if you do have your phone in your hand she thinks you are just looking at it instead of taking a photo of her.  I know you will want to get lots of photos and reminders of her, just as I did, and I’m so happy to have the photos that I did manage to get, but please try not to stress her out too much with this.

Frankie, please love Curley, look after her and comfort her until I can get up there to look after you both.  Every boy needs a puppy, and I’m glad that you finally have one up there to look after.  She will love you and protect you with every beat of her heart until I can get to you, and I know you will look after her just as well as I did.  I am trusting her entirely to your care up there now, and she couldn’t be in safer hands.

I love you so much my precious son and my beautiful furbaby, look after each other, and I will be up there to look after you both as soon as I can.

All my love forever,

Mummy xxxxx